If you can’t beat ’em, join ’em

From the Capitol Weekly article, “One lesbian’s view: Why stop with Proposition 8?”:

Introducing Operation: Love and Marriage, a straightforward voter initiative designed to demonstrate that even though we may be bitter at the passage of Proposition 8, gays do take family values just as seriously as their heterosexual counterparts do. So much so, that we’re willing to stop working on our own marriages to focus on their families while gathering the 700,000 signatures needed to get the following propositions on the next statewide ballot.

The following are only working titles and summaries of the suggested propositions for Operation: Love and Marriage.
Me and Mrs. Jones. A simple amendment. Since fornication is a sin according to the Bible, it’s time for California to take the lead in declaring adultery a crime punishable by time in state prison.

Till Death Do You Part. One out of two marriages in divorce today. Let’s change those statistics by amending California’s state constitution to say that once you are married, you must stay married until death do you part. Be it murder or suicide, until your husband or wife is declared officially dead by a coroner’s office, you cannot under any circumstances remarry or take up another partner. Period. This is designed to make sure that marriages and traditional family values are restored and upheld. However, there is an Anna Mae Bullock/Ike Turner clause that says if you can prove your husband or wife is beating you senseless, you can petition the courts for a special circumstances divorce. A divorce will only be granted, after a special investigation ensuring that there really is physical abuse in the marriage.

No More Baby Mamas. Even with condoms and birth control pills, too many children are being born out of wedlock. No More Baby Mamas says that if a man gets a woman pregnant, he must marry her. If he or she is already married, please refer to proposition Me and Mrs. Jones.

Frankly, the straights had it coming. And I heartily concur.


About fenifuego

Just trying to make sense of myself and the world.
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